Episode 45 • Super Villains • Why Being Bad Is So Damn Good

[00:00:01] This is Kinks and Cocktails, a podcast where we explore all things kink and all things drink. Kinks and Cocktails contains explicit content. Listener discretion is advised. Hi, how's it going? Good. I have a surprise for you. I-I-yeah, you mentioned that, so... Close your eyes. Okay, my eyes are closed. No peeking.

[00:00:28] Okay, I'm not peeking. I hear wrapping paper or something. What do we got? What surprise we got? Okay, hang on. Don't put anything in my mouth. Damn it! Surprise ruined! No, I'm joking. Mmm, I'm nervous. What's going on? Are you? This is taking too long. I want to open my eyes now. Okay, open your eyes. Aww! Happy birthday month to you and I.

[00:00:56] And happy celebration month of our one-year anniversary doing this podcast together to you and I. Yay! Happy celebration month of everything. Celebration of doing the podcast together for one year together in one month. Yay! Yay, and happy birthday. You and I. Aww, that's so sweet! Okay, I love the candle. It's a hostess cupcake with a candle in it. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Are you gonna take a picture? Yeah! Okay. I'm gonna take a little video actually, so we can capture the moment. Maybe I'll redo that.

[00:01:26] Ready? No, no, no. Wait, am I re-singing it? No, no, this is the best part. Okay, now I'll blow it out. Ready? Okay, okay. Ready? Yay! Yay! There we go. Nice. Aw, thanks! That was so sweet! Yeah! That song was hard to sing. Yeah! I'm not sure I caught all the words, but hey, whatever. That was sweet. It's our birthday month and we've been doing this podcast together for one year officially this month. Cheers to that! Cheers! Alright, clink.

[00:01:56] Clink. And drink. There we go. Yes! Mm-hmm. Go us! That's so exciting! Yeah, go us! I noticed it the other night, I'm like, oh my god, I gotta do something. Okay. I know, I realized that as I was getting here and I was like, oh, I remember her saying happy birthday to me on our podcast last year. I also have a gift for you. Oh, yes, you talked about that. Uh-huh. Are you ready? I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. I'm ready. Here it is. Oh my god, that is so cool! It's a Marvel...

[00:02:25] Yeah, it's a Marvel backpack! A friend of mine gave it to me a few days ago, just randomly. Yeah! So the Marvel Universe had it end up in my possession and now it's yours. Oh my god, that is so cool! Yeah! Thank you so much! You're welcome! I'm gonna wear this fucking thing everywhere. This is so perfect for me. Yes! Aw, thanks boo-hoo! You're welcome. I have one more gift for you, but I'm gonna save it for Patreon. Okay. And it's not here yet, it's coming in the mail, so. Yeah, and we'll do this again when it gets closer to your birthday, because there's just a few days after that. Okay!

[00:02:56] Aw! All right, so yeah, if you wanna see Eve opening up that gift, join our Patreon at patreon.com slash kingsandcocktails. Yeah. It's only a dollar a month. Mm-hmm. Thanks everyone! Yeah! There we are. Um... Are we gonna take a little pause too, for people to go do five stars? Oh yeah! Okay, but yeah, before we get started, please check us out everywhere on social media, TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, YouTube. Mm-hmm. Hulk smash that like and subscribe button.

[00:03:25] Ha ha ha ha! And, please rate us five stars on Apple or Spotify. Yeah, it's a big time help. It really helps us out so much. And so much so, we are gonna pause for like 30 seconds and... Maybe, maybe 10. Yeah, 10 seconds. Yeah, insert Jeopardy music or whatever. And go like us, five stars. Go! Go! Okay.

[00:03:55] Okay, perfect. All right, thank you. Thank you, everyone. So yeah, Eve, uh... Wow, we've been recording, what, twice? Yeah. In the past... Yeah, last week, this week. Yeah. We're back on schedule because, you know... Life. Yeah. Yeah. Health issues and whatnot. Yeah. So yeah, life seems to be back to normal. It's weird how that... Yeah, somewhat exactly. Uh-huh. You know, with new challenges, but you know, we're here with it. Yeah, we love you, Dani. Yeah, we love you. We're keeping things going around here. Yep, absolutely.

[00:04:24] So what have you been up to the last seven days? Um, well, uh, let's see. Nothing really new in my world except for that I've been prepping for my birthday party coming up at Gateway. Yep, yes. I've got a gig tonight for my birthday out in St. Cloud. Thanks, Robert! Yes. Hi. Yeah, but I've got a lot of gigs this month, so that's really what I've been doing. Nice. Good. So, kids back in school, all night, jazz. Oh, yeah. Yeah, mine's in high school now, the youngest one. Oh, yeah. Oh, well. Mine's driving now.

[00:04:54] Oh, God. Yeah. Okay, let's stop aging ourselves. Yeah, I know, right? We're not that old. We're just very... We're... Pee-people. Anyways, moving on. I did want to give a... Yeah, we went to barbecues, both of us did. Mm-hmm. A couple of them were the same one we went to together. Yeah, Deanna's house. Yeah. Shout out Deanna. Yeah. And also, another barbecue I went to with, I went to... Shout out to my friend Katie. Mm-hmm. You know who you are. She loves our podcast.

[00:05:22] I haven't seen her in years, and she said she listens. So I wanted to give her a special shout out. That was so sweet, by the way, to hear that. Yeah. That was so awesome. Let's see. Mm-hmm. What else? Danny and I got a new chest freezer yesterday. You know, I'm so excited for this. Wow, this is like... When did we turn into, like, regular people? I know. Oh, I drink coffee now. I'm a coffee drinker. I don't drink coffee because... You know me. I never did before. Yeah. And then... I don't know what happened. Katie, are you turning into a normal person? Shh.

[00:05:52] Also, what's normal? I know. There is no normal. Come on. I, like, stopped drinking all this alcohol all the time, and now I'm like, I drink coffee, and I go shopping for chest freezers. Like... There's probably a kink for that. Oh, yeah. Getting old. Yeah. We can make anything weird, I think. Yep. So... Speaking of drinks, what are we drinking today? Well, a lot of the super villains are, you know, they are depicted as well-to-do people. Yeah.

[00:06:21] So they drink a lot of fancy things. So we've got... We've got... Martinis. And bourbon. Yeah. Yes. We have a flight. We have a flight. A drink flight. Yes. Of all the fancy things that... Mm-hmm. Small portions. Because we don't need to get wasted over here. Don't listen to her. They're giant drinks. Okay. Jeez. I'm kidding. Yeah. No. I gotta go to St. Cloud after this, so... You're not driving. That's true. That is true. But I don't want to be wasted for my set.

[00:06:51] That's never a good look. Never a good look. Mm-hmm. Very true. Mm-hmm. All right. Snack pairing. So for super villains, I figured they either go one of two ways. They're either going to like a five-star restaurant. Mm-hmm. Or they're eating junk food and... We're not going to a five-star restaurant. I'm sorry. In this economy. We are a five-star restaurant right here. What are you talking about? I mean... That cupcake looks like five-star. Yes. Our host is cupcake. Yes.

[00:07:17] So everyone, please join our Patreon so we can maybe go to a five-star restaurant. Yeah. I don't know. It's only a dollar a month, so... Yeah. ...in this economy, we created it affordable for everyone. You should auction off a date at a five-star restaurant with us. Uh-huh. Oh, that would be fun. Mm-hmm. Like they used to do, you know, back in the olden days, auction off dates and stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Well, okay, we do go to Frenchman's before every time we record. If you... Most of the time. Not every time. Yeah. Yeah. Perfect.

[00:07:46] That's actually a really great idea. Okay. Yeah. All right, moving on. Funfetti. Yeah. So last time I used AI to make us superheroes. Mm-hmm. Um, I made it... I made us into super villains this time. Do you want to see? I feel like we looked like super villains in that last one. Kind of. But yeah, I do want to see. Yeah. Here you go. Oh my. I don't know which I like better. Right? We look pretty hot. Wow. I'll post these on social media too. Oh my God. I like it.

[00:08:15] We have like lights in our hands, like a fiery ball. Like you have green, I have purple. I'm holding like staff. Do I have a black? Are those black horns? Yeah. We both have horns. Nice. Okay. So we have to recreate those outfits for real life. Absolutely. Mm-hmm. All right. More funfetti. We'll take it back. Yes. Take back the facade. Love it. That it put out there. Make it ours. So when Todd Phillips' film Joker premiered in 2019,

[00:08:45] Pornhub reported a massive surge of over almost 800,000 searches involving the word the Joker in just four days. Wow. Mm-hmm. But Harley Quinn still dominates porn searches, of course, out of all comic book characters. Yeah. Yeah, of course. Cause she cray cray. Oh yeah. In such a good way. And she's hot. She don't give a fuck. Uh-huh. So you gotta imagine that's gonna be some freaky shit, you know what I'm saying? Mm-hmm. Absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. Love Harley Quinn.

[00:09:15] Yeah, we love us some Harley Quinn. Yes. Mm-hmm. All right, let's see. Mm-hmm. What else? That's a pretty fun fact. I think that's- Yeah. Should we get started? Yeah. We made the list a little bit shorter this time so we could spend some more time on the characters. Yes. I mean, let's face it, like, supervillains probably get freaky. Oh, super freaky. Yeah, super freaky. Um, we will go over the Joker every once in a while. Yeah. Don't worry, we'll get there. Don't worry, we'll get there. We'll get there so slowly.

[00:09:45] I'm gonna, you know what? I started off with my vodka soda. I'm gonna switch it up. I'm gonna- Should we try the martini? Yeah. You know what? That sounds good. Yeah. Okay. I took a little video of you making them. Oh, yeah. Yep. What? Shaking the shaker. Okay, they're kind- It was kind of far away in case anybody's wondering why I made that weird noise. Right, she- We have, like, a side table next to our recording table of, like, it's all just filled with drinks. Yeah. Right now. Or whatever we need for the show. Yeah. So- Right now it's all drinks. Yeah, it's- God. The Pinot Noir is box wine. Yeah. For the box.

[00:10:15] There we go. Yeah. We don't have wine, so that's all I do. Yeah. I'm allergic to the salt face. I know. So- Okay. Okay. Martini. Mmm. I don't do vermouth in my martini, just so you know. I don't really- I just do olive juice and vodka. Yeah, well, that's actually much better. I'm not a huge vermouth fan. Me either. Nope. That tastes really good.

[00:10:40] Yeah, so when I order a martini at a restaurant, it's, uh, let's see, extra dry? Yes. Yeah. I don't know. I just tell them to make it. Like, make it how you like it. Uh-huh. Extra dirty, extra dry. There we go. I don't know. Extra dirty and extra dry. Hmm. Means- Yes. Hmm. It almost sounds sexy, but it's like, it's the dry part. It's almost sexy, but not quite. I know. It's like, are we raw-dogging this? I know. Anyway.

[00:11:10] All right. So, who are we starting with? Loki. Ooh. Ooh. No. Literally the god of mischief. Ooh. Yeah. And dude. Mm. You like some Loki? He's so hot. Yes. Yeah. He's just so hot. He's just so hot. He's just mischievous. He's kind of a smartass. He's kind of a smartass. He's kind of a smartass. Yes. Yep. He's sexy and, I mean. He can do the shape-shifting. Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

[00:11:41] Yeah. So, when you think about banging Loki, you can really bang whoever you want. Yep. Right? Or, because he's a villain, would he use that for good or bad in the bedroom if you're having sex with him? I mean, I feel like- Like, would he all of a sudden change it as somebody you don't like and be mean? That's pretty- As, like, a dominant person? Like, ha-ha. Like, ooh. Yeah, but what if you're, like, into that? Like, what? Right. I don't know. It would be. Yeah. I need to leave now. Mike!

[00:12:11] Show's done. Show's done. Seriously, like, oh man, now I'm getting all pre-clamped. We turn off the air conditioner we shouldn't have. Whoops. Yeah, it's sometimes you can hear the vent, so. Yeah. Yeah, that's fine. No, I mean, and he can make all kinds of things. He can, like, imagine the toys or the things that he would just poof into existence. Mm-hmm. Oh. Yeah.

[00:12:39] I mean, and he can be in multiple places at once, right? Yeah. Yeah. So there's, like, a scene somewhere where there's, like, a million of them. Yeah, so you could, like, totally have a threesome with Loki and himself. Or an eightsome. Or a tensome. A whole gangbang of Loki. A whole gangbang of Lokis. Woo! Oh my. I mean, like, I would be into it if it was that. Eve's, like, sweating over there. I am sweating. Yeah. Well, I guess, without question, smash or pass?

[00:13:08] Oh, fucking smash all day. All ten of them. All ten of them, whatever. God. Anyway. All right. Let's see. Well, next we got the penguin, and that's really just not really gonna come up. Sorry. God dang. I can't help it. Yeah, we start with Loki and you're like, well, what about the penguin? Boo. Oh my God. So I can't stop laughing just thinking about... I don't want to think about having sex with the penguin.

[00:13:36] From the Batman Returns movie played by Danny DeVito for 1992. Gross! I know! There, every, every, every version of the penguin is not attractive. I'm right. In the show. I mean, like, what was his, what's his name? Colin, was it Colin Farrell that played him? They dressed, you can't even tell it's him. Was it? Yes. Oh my God. Anyway. Are you sure? Hold on. I may be mixing up the name. Okay. Anyway, yeah, keep going while I looked that up.

[00:14:06] Didn't he wear a suit in some of the versions, like not looking like the Danny DeVito version? I can't stop thinking about that one. Yeah, let's just, you know, let's look up, it's, yeah, it was, uh, fucking criminy. Let's see. Oh God. Just the... It just... Oh man. Because the Danny DeVito one really did look like a penguin. He's like... I was looking at pictures right now, every version. Tubby, skinny legs. Oh God. None of these are attractive. Like this, this is the one from the, like, I'm showing her a picture.

[00:14:35] No. Like that's... No, even though he's in a suit, he's still not attractive. Yeah. No, he just looks like he's gonna hurt you. Yeah. But not... Not in a good way. Yeah, Colin Farrell, that was right. Okay. Yeah. So like, this is... Colin Farrell, attractive man, dressed up as the penguin? Mm-mm. No. No thank you. Okay, well I did find one good thing about the penguin. Okay. He would have the AC cranked up at all times. Okay. I still would pass hardcore.

[00:15:05] Still not enough to... Maybe he'd be fun if you like, needed to like, kill your worst enemy with or something. I don't know. We're talking about in the bedroom though, so... Yeah, exactly. Yeah, move on. No, no. Pass. Pass. Hard pass. Hard pass. All right. Soft pass actually. No. No. Sister Sage. Okay. From the boys. Yes. So if you don't know, her superpower is that she's the smartest woman on the planet. Yes. Yep.

[00:15:35] Smartest person on the planet. Okay. In the boys. So she has the ability to really just, you know, manipulate any situation to make it what she wants it to be. Outsmart everybody. Outsmart everyone. Exactly. However... So her sexual thrill... Yes. Is to stab herself through the eye so that she can switch it around in her brains and make herself stupid for a little bit. Give herself a lobotomy. Yeah. Before sex. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So she can like be... Be freaky. Be a dumb slut if she wants to. Exactly. That's her thing.

[00:16:05] That's what she wants. Yeah. Forget about life and stop being so smart. So... Yeah. Her foreplay is like, give me a lobotomy. Yeah, give me a lobotomy so I can be a dumb ass and just fuck your brains out. Yep. So... The scene I watched, she said that and he's like, are you serious? Yeah. Yeah, then you can fuck me in the ass for hours and he's like, all right, done. Let's go. Yeah. So... Where do I stick it? So it's like, all right, sister Sage, be freaky. Let's go.

[00:16:35] Although, I think I'd want to like bang her as a smart person. Oh, for sure. You know? Yes. Yeah, but I can understand why she wants to like let loose. Oh, absolutely. Have zero cares in the world. Yep. Ignorance is bliss as they say. Yep. And clearly in her case. Yeah. So what would you do with her? If she was smart or playing dumb for a while? I don't know. Why not both? Too bad she can't be like Loki and have one of each. Oh, right? Oh, that'd be fun. Oh wait, Loki could be her. There we go. Okay.

[00:17:05] Now we're getting somewhere. Okay. We're setting up the perfect like threesome. Orgy thingy. Yeah. Okay. All right. All right. Now we're getting somewhere. Let's see. I guess she's, I would just, well, let her be dumb if she's smart, you know? Oh yeah. And then dominate her if she's dumb. That sounds about right. That sounds about right. Yeah. Oh yeah. That's what I would want, you know? To empower her. Yeah. If she's the smartest person, she probably knows what you want best.

[00:17:35] Mm-hmm. Yeah. It has a lot of great ideas. Oh yeah. Of how to do it. Yeah. Yeah. Smash. Smash all day. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Let's go. Yeah. Okay. Poison Ivy. Okay. Smash. Oh wait, we have to talk about her first. Yeah. Well, the other, like, are you gonna, does she have to, I don't, how are you gonna avoid getting poisoned? Okay.

[00:18:03] So, yeah, cause like her kisses are. Yeah. It's like they're poison. Yeah. She's Poison Ivy. She's gonna get you. Mm-hmm. So. But she can like have, she can choose how much poison comes out of her lips when she kisses someone. So she can give you just a little tingle in your. Yeah. Maybe. Cause her. Isn't it her and, um, who's the other one? That does poison stuff? No. Is it her that has an open relationship with Harley Quinn?

[00:18:33] Oh yeah. In the cartoon. Yeah. Or whatever. Yeah. So she chooses not to give Harley a lot of poison, obviously. Obviously. But like her enemies all the way. All day. Yeah. So having sex with her, it kind of be like a form of dendrophilia. Oh yeah. Everyone check out episode four about dendrophilia. Yeah. Like having sex with plants and mother nature. Mm-hmm. Um, so yeah, be careful with her kisses, I guess. Yeah. And I can't, I'm, I'm blanking on this.

[00:18:59] I should have asked this question before we started, but she can control plants and things like that. Yeah. I think so. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I thought. So like, what's that about? What would we do there? Oh God. Like control, like, like the vines of things? Oh God. Mm. Tie you up? Yep. Absolutely. Yeah. And her body itself naturally exudes plant-based pheromones. Oh, sure.

[00:19:24] And so, yeah, those chemicals are like, they're overriding everybody's brains and getting seduced by her, basically. Oh, yeah. I mean, that sounds about right. Oh, yeah. Nice. Definitely smash. Definitely. I mean, and her outfits are always so sexy. It's like she's walking around wearing sexy lingerie. So hot. I've always wanted to be here for Halloween. Oh, yeah. Her outfits. Doesn't she have red hair? Yes. Yeah. I'd have to get a red wig.

[00:19:54] I would look good as a redhead, I think. I think so. Yeah. I guess I've never tried. Yeah, let's do that. All right. I'll be Wonder Woman and you can be Poison Ivy. Oh, my God. Love it. I sent some content incoming. Yes. Oh, boy. Oh, you need to sign up for OnlyFans. Oh, thank you for putting that on the podcast. You've heard it here first. Jeez, Louise. We do have a free OnlyFans. It's not what you think, everyone. It's just...

[00:20:24] Yeah, they're going to already use their imagination. We're talking about having sex with supervillain chicks. Oh, by the way. By the way. I use it for promotion for the podcast. I don't... There's nothing X-rated. Oh, wait. I should say that there is so people just go and follow us. It's totally what you think it is. Oh, my God. Go follow us. Lordy, lordy. Just like how we have a FetLife I use for social media for promotion for the podcast. Yes. Nothing. That's it. I'm going to take a sip of this martini on that note.

[00:20:54] Go follow us on FetLife and OnlyFans. I'm serious. It's like... All right. So, on that note, Firecracker. Go see for yourself, everyone. I swear to God. All right. Next on the list, Firecracker. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So, Firecracker is, again, she's from The Boys. Yes. She's very, like, American pride Trump-y type of person. And she's very, like, conspiracy theorist, right? Big time. But, like... Yeah.

[00:21:22] You know, she's just doing it for popularity. Mm-hmm. You know? It's... Okay. You will find out... And I won't give away any, you know, spoilers or whatever, but it's all kind of a bit of a facade. Okay. So, and she... Her superpowers are not that powerful. Okay. She's like Firecracker, because she can make little... Little, like... She does this, and she makes snaps of fire. Little sparks. Okay. That sounds adorable, actually. It is adorable, actually. It's super cute.

[00:21:49] She's not a super cute character, but she tries to stir the pot on social media. Okay. With the other characters. So, she's pretty evil when it comes to that. Okay. Fun. Yeah. All right. But she didn't grow up that way. Uh-huh. So, anyways... Yeah, I don't know too much about her, but... Yeah. Well, she's kind of a bitch. Okay. Like an asshole. Uh-huh. She's just like... I would want to bend her over the bed and give her a lesson. Like a hate fuck?

[00:22:19] Something like that. I don't know. Because she just says evil things to people that are just... Uh-huh. You know? And it's like... I mean, not... I mean, like... Like, obviously consensual. Yes. But it's like... Yeah. That's what seems like she needs. It's a good lesson. Yeah. She needs a good lesson. A good lesson. Also... So, her name's Firecracker. Yeah. I think the... I think the... You know...

[00:22:51] Never mind. I thought you meant something else. That she makes sparks. Never mind. In different places. My head was somewhere else. Oh, I'm sure she... Maybe she could do that. I don't know. They don't go over that. I used to be super impressed if she did. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, that's... Smash or pass? You know, it depends on the situation, but mostly pass. Yeah. Mostly pass. I'd be curious about the firecrackers. The fire... Oh, makes sparks. Yep. Yeah, that'd be interesting. I'd want to see that, but... Maybe... That's about it.

[00:23:21] Yeah. Okay, now I'm thinking. Yeah. Magneto. Yeah, Magneto. From X-Men. Uh-huh. So, Magneto. He can control metal. Make things fly around, whatever. That's his superpower. So, I'm curious. Magnetic field. Yeah, exactly. So, what are your thoughts on Magneto? Um, so, my notes, I said, what about those steel butt plugs?

[00:23:51] Can you control those? Manipulate them to do whatever they want? All metal. Yeah. So... Oh, no. I don't know if it's dangerous or naughty. Both? Both. What did you think? That's where my mind went. Well, now I have a whole nother thought process. See, I was thinking, like, you know, bend bars and attach you to bed and, like, control, like...

[00:24:18] ...you know, handcuffs and other metal apparatus and things of that nature. He could control, you know, metal nipple clamps with his mind. I mean, basically, he could sit across the room in the cuck chair... Yep. ...and fuck with you, not even move. Yep. Him and... What was the other one that could do that that we talked about last episode? Um... I don't remember. Where we're like... She's like, I am the remote. I don't remember. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so... Oh, so they should hang out and do that together.

[00:24:45] Yeah, they could just have dual cuck chairs and never touch each other. Like, Magneto's just in the corner jacking off. Oh, my God. Oh, I thought you meant, like, they can team up on the same person. They could do that, too. Yeah. Well, they wouldn't be cucking then. They're just sitting in the cuck chair. Well, he's, like, you're... Let's see, you're in the bed. Yeah. And you're in there. And he's doing stuff to you while he's watching himself do it. There we go. Okay. Yep. True. True. And then you introduce Loki. Uh-huh. And then Loki can also cuck himself because he can make a version of himself while he's fucking you.

[00:25:15] And then Magneto is cucking both of us with Magneto. I mean, with Loki. This is getting real deep. We need a... This is like Inception. We need a visual drawing. It's getting confusing. We'll introduce the cuck-shen-al. The cuck-shen-al. Trademark. I love it. Oh, God. Quite the orgy. All right. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my God. Mystique. Yes. She's the blue gal from X-Men. Yeah.

[00:25:45] So... She's hot. She's very hot. And she's always naked. Pretty much. Yeah. There's a lot of porn about Mystique online. Like a ton. Mm-hmm. Yep. Witch tracks. I mean, like, she's always naked in the movies. Mm-hmm. And she is just... She's mysterious. She's Mystique. Very Mystique. Yeah. Mm-hmm. A woman of few words. Yeah. She'll get you. Oh, yeah. And she's very flexible. Is she? Yeah. Okay. I didn't know that. Oh, yeah. She shapeshifts. She shapeshifts, yeah. Okay.

[00:26:15] She can be any person, like Loki, but in a different way. All these shapeshifters. Jeez. Just... Our minds are going. Could be your worst nightmare or your best friend. Who knows? So... We... What about Lex Luthor, though? Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't want to talk about that. Yeah, because we switched him out for somebody. Mm-hmm. So Lex Luthor is a supervillain. However, doesn't really have powers. But he's super rich, and he's going after Superman. So what do you think?

[00:26:43] I mean, most super wealthy billionaires are villains. So it tracks. Yeah, that makes sense. That makes sense. So he's depicted as an attractive person in some movies. Some comments in others not as attractive, depending upon what your version of that is. Okay. So I don't know. He seems like he'd be very selfish in the bedroom. You think so? I think so. I don't have many notes about him. You know more about him than I do, so... Just went by what you're saying.

[00:27:13] Yeah, he's just obsessed with defeating Superman. Okay. It's basically his whole chick. I thought you were going to say obsessed with himself. That also. Okay. That also. So he'd be like... He'd be like Magneto. He'd cuck... If he could, he'd cuck himself, but it wouldn't be for a pleasure of you. God. I feel like Magneto would be like, yeah, let's get it. Smash or pass? I'd pass. Me too. Yeah. Not appealing. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. All right. I might switch. I'm going to... We do have this whiskey. I'm going to... Oh, yeah. ...switch it up a bit here.

[00:27:43] Yeah, switch it up. We're not big whiskey fans. No, so there's just a tiny smidge... Smission. We just have it here just to say that we did it. Yeah. Thank you. There we go. Cheers. Thanks, Dani. Yep. Mm. Yes. Smell it. Oh, you shot yours. Well, there wasn't that much. That's true. I didn't want to have to drink it again. That's... All right. I guess I'll do the same. Here we go. Yeah. It was just... It wasn't even... It's like a third of a shot, maybe. Ugh. But it's expensive whiskey.

[00:28:10] Well, any whiskey shooting it is... Whoo! Okay. That woke me up. Gross. I need to chase it with a martini. Oh, my God. Okay. Typical us. Okay. Yes. Typical us. Let's just... Yeah. So, Hela. We talked about Thor last... Yep. Last week. So... Hela's a goddess of death? Mm-hmm. Okay. Yep. Thor and Loki's sister. Okay. So, yeah. So, what are your notes on Hela?

[00:28:40] I'm very curious here. She would probably enjoy being worshipped in the bedroom. Oh, that is 100% accurate. Okay. Yes. I would agree with that because that's her whole thing is she wants to come and take over. She's pissed off that her dad trapped her. And then as soon as he passes, she gets released into the wild. So, she wants to take over and rule the entire universe. All right. Be worshipped by everyone. Yeah.

[00:29:10] As the goddess that she is. Including in the bedroom. Mm-hmm. I'm assuming. Yeah. So, I feel like she would have a lot of human furniture. Oh, my God. You're right. Mm-hmm. What episode was that? Yeah, we did. What was episode something? Something. I can't remember. Our Fornifilia episode? Yeah. Yeah. Let me look quick. Yeah. But, yeah. We have a whole episode on that. We do. Mm-hmm. And I feel like this would be where she lives. Like, every single piece of furniture in her palace, because she would not have a home,

[00:29:38] would be some sort of person worshipping. A person, footstool, a person lamp. Lamp. Table, lamp, holding, you know. Episode 30. 30. That's right. Go check out the human furniture episode. Yeah. So. That would be totally her game. Mm-hmm. 100%. Yeah. But I feel like, too, when you're actually having sex with her, she wants you to be in charge, because she's always in charge the whole rest of the time. Yeah. Like, come on, just do it to me. Yeah. You know? They want to lose control. Yeah. Right.

[00:30:08] Like, when you can't, when you're the type of person where you have to make decisions all day long, every day, in all of your life, you just want to be like, come on, just do me. Yeah. I don't want to decide on this right now. I, so. I choose coffee table today. I, I choose lamp. I heart lamp. I heart, I love lamp. I love lamp. Yeah. So. Life is hard. Just, oh, coffee table. I'm a coffee table today. Yes. Exactly. So, then. Smash or pass, though? Oh, yeah, yeah. I would smash, for sure. I would say pass. Oh, yeah.

[00:30:37] Unless I'm feeling like being a coffee table that day. Yeah. Everyone has those days, you know? Yeah. I mean, everybody's got those days. You want to just let loose and not make any decisions about your life. Yep. Yeah. So. Venom. Oh, gosh. Yeah. I mean, like, first, you have to appreciate the dichotomy of the character. Mm-hmm. Because Venom is technically an extraterrestrial creature. Yes.

[00:31:05] That is a symbiote with the main character. Yes. So. Isn't he, like, actually really playful and goofy? Yeah. Too. Yeah. So, it's like, would you want to smash while he's Venom? Or, and I'm blanking on the character's name. Jack, I think, it is. But I'm like. Well, Venom. Yeah. Yeah. I'm like. He's got the long tongue. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Good point.

[00:31:34] Also, he's kind of a shapeshifter a little bit, too. It's more like a creature, but, like, he can make himself into, like, he's a horse in one of the movies. Really? Running at full speed. Oh, yeah. Okay. Oh, yeah. And so, you know, it's probably a lot of crazy shit they could do. Yeah. I mean, long tongue, the sharp, scary teeth, like, it would just be different. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Smash. Smash. Oh, smash all day. Yeah. All right. I think the last one here. Yeah. The Joker. The Joker. Okay.

[00:32:05] This is the one where typically all the gorillas are like, oh, my God, I love the Joker. He's so hot. He's, like, just the way he is, you know. Yeah. What do you think? Well, I feel like some of them do not know every version of the Joker. Uh-huh. Because the Joker's been around in comics, obviously, for 50-ish plus years, whatever, and then in the original Batman show. Yeah. Not an attractive. Yep. Not somebody I would think of as, like, oh, I'm gonna go smash that guy, but let's go.

[00:32:34] But then has progressed over the years to this bad boy. Right. With super hot actors playing the Joker. But he's still, his personality is, like, okay. Insane. So, I had this in my notes. Mm-hmm. Okay. So, dating the Joker would be, like, dating that super unhinged, manipulative guy who love bombs you in week one. Then he's completely gaslights you and acts like a total psycho the second. Yeah. Yes. If you don't feed into his massive ego. Like. Right.

[00:33:04] Exactly. Or just drops you, like, a bad habit at the first chance he gets. Well, okay. I had some examples of, like, the guy today. The guys that every girl knows this guy. Okay. So, he'd be like, I was ignoring your texts. I was gaming. Don't you even care about my hobbies? I was. Or another one. He'd be like, I didn't forget your birthday, babe. I had to watch the game with the boys. God, you're so selfish.

[00:33:34] Wow. Yeah. And the best one. You know, and there's girls, like, there's all walks of life that are people like that. We all know that person. That does that shit. Yes. I'm like, what? The best one. Ghost them. Ghost those people, my friends. Yeah. Ghost them. If somebody does that shit to you, ghost them and never talk to them again. You will live rent-free in their head. Oh, yeah. It'll be fine. The best one. This one's my favorite. Mm-hmm. If he gets caught cheating, he'd be like, see, this is why I didn't want to tell you about her, because I knew you would act this way.

[00:34:03] Oh, laudy, laudy. Totally the way. Yeah. Okay. That's the joker. Yeah. That's him. Yup. 100%. You're going to ruin our Friday night over Batman being an asshole or something stupid. Yeah. Like, yes. Wow. Jeez Louise. Uh-huh. Yeah, so. We all know girls are with these guys. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[00:34:30] And that's, I think every version of the joker is that type of person. Mm-hmm. So. Except for maybe the one that's in, you know, the Batman Lego movies. Oh, God. Oh. It's kind of funny, actually. I guess. But, I mean, we're not going to have sex with a Lego character. Right. Oh, God. But that, that's the only one I can think of. That's so funny. That's like, oh, he might not be terrible. Right. The only time he's, like, not a horrible, manipulative asshole. Yeah, he's still kind of an asshole, but at least there's some humor to go with it. Yeah.

[00:35:01] So. So in the bedroom, what would he be like then? Like, if he's that kind of guy. I think he's going to be pretty freaky. He's going to, like. Like. I think these are the type of guys also that either he doesn't care if you come or not. Like, he comes and then whatever. Or he's going to be super freaky, like you said, and do all this crazy shit. Yeah, like, I feel like at least guys like that I've met in the past or, like, they want you to come because of their own, like, like, it's an ego thing. Yeah.

[00:35:31] Yeah. That and they make you do it, like, come in the weirdest, craziest way. Yeah. And they just want to. And I'm like, okay, that's fine. I don't have to hang out with you all. So, right. Okay. It's like, perfect. Sounds good. Just get away from me when you're done. See you later. I mean, yeah. So. Well, that's it. That's the list. Yeah. Yeah. We got through. I'm almost done with my martini here. I still have a full vodka soda. We finished. Yeah, we barely drink any of this. I know.

[00:36:00] You still have a full glass of wine. But yeah. No, it's. This is water. This is the water. It's in a wine glass. I love how the water is full and all the drinks are halfway gone. Well, I think I drink some of it. Like a sip. It says blood on it, though. On the wine glass? Yeah, because the glass color makes it look like blood. It's a red wine glass and it says the word blood on it. I got it the other day and. Yeah. I don't know. I thought it was fun. It's for my bloody pleasures. There we go. Yeah. That was weird. I don't know why I said that. Yeah, it's for Halloween.

[00:36:33] Or vampires. Mm hmm. Oh, Halloween. Halloween's coming up. What? How did we not pay attention to that? We are trying to figure out our next. Yeah, we're figuring out our Halloween costumes and Halloween's in like a month. Well, and we're trying to figure out our next episode, too. Because this wraps up the super villain superhero stuff. Yes, exactly. Should we do vampires? Let's do vampires! Okay! Let's do it! Yes! Okay. Oh my God, yes. We are going to cling to that. Cling to that. With the wine. Perfect. All right. I'm stoked for this.

[00:37:04] We've been talking earlier. Frenchmans were like, what should we do? What should we do? I'll figure it out. Yeah, we were kind of throwing around the idea of doing anal, but I think... One of these days. One of these days. We'll get to that. We'll get there. Vampires. That's what's up. Okay. Yeah, spooky season. Yeah, spooky season. Perfect. We could do a whole month of just stuff like that. Oh, yeah. Absolutely. For sure. So let's start with vampires. Yes. I'm excited. Yeah. Let's go. All right. We'll bring the blood wine glasses. Yeah.

[00:37:33] Oh, I'm so excited for... No, I'll go get one. Okay, cool. Yeah. Yeah. Dollar tree. Yeah, go do it. Do it, do it. Before I go spend a hundred more dollars at Dollar Tree. Get a hundred things? Well, because... Seriously, I get a full cart because it's like... It's only a dollar. It's only a dollar. A dollar 25 now. Whatever. But then it's like... Everything's less than five bucks. It's only a dollar. And then it racks up to like a hundred dollars. You're like, oh shit. Oops. Well. Well. Here we are.

[00:38:01] I was like, try to go there to be cheap and then end up with way too much stuff. Okay. Well, it's like when you walk into Target. Okay. Okay. Target should be its own fucking kink. Yeah. Because I swear every time I walk in there, they have designed it so you walk in and I'm like, I actually don't remember why I came to Target every fucking time. Yeah. And I know I came there for like three things. Yeah. I needed like batteries and like, you know, some fucking juice or some shit. Yeah. And I walk out of there with like a pillow and a blanket and some art for the fucking

[00:38:30] wall or some shit. I don't know. Yeah. So like Sundays after, there used to be like a Sunday daytime drinking party called Retox Minneapolis. Mm-hmm. Sometimes after Retox, Danny and I would have to stop by Target. Yeah. And I'd have so many drinks at Retox where I'm like, hee hee hee. I'm like, I'm excited. And so like we walk into Target. I just like take the cart and disappear and like run off. And Danny's like, oh boy. Oh my gosh. Hee hee. And I'm like, he'd be like calling me and I'm like in the candle section or something.

[00:39:00] Yeah. You're like, I found some candles. He's just like, oh no. And like in the cart, you like full of stuff. And I'm like, well, you should have taken me shopping after cocktails. That's your fault. Sorry. Oh my God. Uh-huh. All right. Well, maybe we'll do Target, a Target run after one of our episodes. After this, we've had enough drinks. We should not go to Target right now. No. No. I mean, we can't really drink that much though. We just need like a couple of sips of each.

[00:39:30] I pretty much quit drinking a lot. Yeah. So I'm kind of tipsy. Okay. Yeah. No Target for me. Yeah. Sounds good. Danny went and ran all of our errands while we recorded. He like purposely did that so I wasn't with. Oh, for sure. For sure. He's filling up the cart, a bunch of dumb stuff. Okay. All right. I think that's it. Yes. Let's wrap it up. Well, have a good trip to St. Cloud. I will indeed. Yes. I'll take some pictures. And send them to you. There we go. I'll go in the bathroom and take a picture of my boobie and send it to you or something.

[00:40:00] I see it in person all the time. So I miss it. I know, right? I miss it when you're gone. Here they are. Thank you. Yay. Yay, boobies. Thank you, Eve. You're welcome. I'm even wearing a pretty bra. Look at this. It is very pretty. Yeah. Oh, I feel so special. Yes. Okay. All right. Cheers. Cheers. Drink to that. Yes. All right. Bye, everyone. We love you. See you soon. Well, talk to you soon. Maybe next week. Maybe next week. Oh, yeah. Mwah. All right. Yes.

[00:40:30] Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye. Bye.